Off Topic: Boys!

The Husband and I (Don't you love his crown?)

This last week has seen skeletons come out of the closet and huge regrets form!

I have a friend who I liked from a far for a while and when he was briefly single last year it became apparent he liked me too however, at the time I was firmly hung up on Mr Thomas and he was still pretty hung up on his ex so, nothing happened.

We both went about our lives he got back with his ex and I focused more on Tom to try and bury what feelings I had for this guy and didn't speak to him for a few months to make it easier on myself. It transpires after a drunken conversation (him being the drunk one) that in his words: "I would happily been yours" I responded saying he would have always gone back to his ex and that he would never have been mine and he responded with "No I wouldn't have had I not thought Tom would own you quite so much" :(

Its unleashed a whole word of regret and pain to think I've been single 3 years and the one guy I really and truly had feelings for would have been mine if I hadn't shut the feelings out and focused on Tom! Ive been over Tom for quite sometime but he is very much a part of my life being my best friend and the one I turn too when anything is wrong. To an outsider Tom and I seem very much like a married couple but its purely Platonic.

I'm not sure what I want out of posting this I suppose its just one of those need to air it to outsiders but, I totally hate feeling regret and having old feelings resurface when I cant do anything to change them. I have since been told that if he is ever single he would love to give it a shot but, that makes me feel 100 times  worse.

Guys say that us girls are mental but, I think they have just as many issues as we do if not more sometimes!

Anyway sorry for this unrelated blurb!